2019 here we are.

We posted a blog almost every day in November.  Then we went silent in December, but to be fair, that's a month you have to conserve whatever energy you have left or you might flip out.  But December 2018 is behind us, the decorations are put away, trash and recycle are finally NOT filling our garages to the max, and I even got my husband to take down the Christmas lights.   If it was up to him, he'd start considering it around the 15th.  If it was up to me, I've have everything down and packed away by noon on the 26th of December.

So now what?  I find that the first week of January I have a lot of left over manic energy from the holidays.  The weird kind that couples with extreme fatigue in an odd way.  So I've cleaned, organized, and otherwise ran around like I have an agenda, which I can't really say that I do because I haven't formulated one yet.  Here are 10 random things I'm pondering.

1.  It  feels very dark in the morning.  It's been hard to wake up, and even though technically the days are getting longer I suddenly am realizing how short they are.  I'm definitely feeling hibernation mode.
2. Someone gave me a Nest Sicilian tangerine candle for Christmas and that thing is magic.  I want to have them on hand ALL the time.  It makes me feel like coming OUT of hibernation.
3. The return of the biker short style is very disturbing to me.  I was shopping with Ava yesterday and there is simply no escaping that trend, and it's traumatic for all of us who lived thru the original bike short fad.  Plus, I like to think I'm "young" enough to pull off most styles in some form or another.  I own a pair of Brandy Melville sweatpants for God's sake, I can roll with my teens.  This one though?  No. Can. Do.
4. I splurged and bought some La Mer renewal oil and the stuff is magic...MAGIC.  I want more already.  At $130 for .5 ounces it's a luxury for sure, but seriously, the stuff is awesome and I'd put myself on a budget to buy it.
5. I went to yoga the other day and the teacher talked about the grace of letting go of goals.  Everyone instantly prickles when you read that because that sounds like a loser's approach right?  But really, it did make perfect sense after she unpacked it.  We start off the year with so many heavy, lofty goals.  Most of which, if statistics mean anything, won't be met.  Her point is that making yourself some goals is great, but if you head in that direction and can't seems to make enough progress mid-way thru, then you need to cut your goal in half and shoot for that.  Something is better than nothing mentality.  Again, sort of sounds negative to an over achiever, but there's some logic to it and what I especially liked is just the concept that there is grace in letting go of what you don't need, can't obtain (for whatever reason), or otherwise want to move past.
6. This is a weird time of year.  You want spring to come, winter clothes are on sale, you want something new, but you definitely are freezing your butt off.  It's the perfect time to buy accessories, and exactly why we brought in our favorite Tees by Tina poncho wrap, because that will pop in some fresh color (or fresh neutral), but it will work squarely with your Spring wardrobe, AND you can wear it now.  That's win-win right there. I bought the cobalt color.  It's got a little punch, and if I had a dollar for every time people commented on that color...it lures people.
7. Ava is leaving for a semester abroad in less than two weeks.  She'll be living in Provence, France for 6 months.  I'm freaking out a little, but trying really hard to hold it together.  It's such an exciting opportunity for her, but she'll be really, REALLY far away.  She's fearless for the most part, but in a way that makes me nervous.  The entire thing is a reminder to me of how quickly time moves, how quickly things change, and how conflicting parenting can be.   I'm going to miss Ava a lot, but what I won't miss is the day to day battles with her (having a kid with ADHD is just not easy, and when you layer that on top of general teenager stuff, it's exhausting).  I'm not even sure what my day to day life will feel like without focusing so much energy in that direction.   It's hard to imagine to be honest. 
8. If you haven't seen Beautiful Boy on Netflix, see it.  If you have teenagers it will freak you out tremendously, but it's really well done.
9. The things I want to BE in 2019 are... centered, calm, healthy and open to new opportunities.
10. I feel grateful to be starting 2019 happy and healthy.

I hope everyone is coming down gently after the mania of last month.  We're going to have a really fun year, I can feel lit!

ox

Signed, ME {lv}